Self Care

[Roni Jean]

Even those of us who have been following this path as a life-long process have to remember to provide for ourselves. We have to make sure that the energy we output is balanced by the input of energy from various channels of our lives. Ideally, we would have a surplus coming in so that we can store some for a rainy day.

We encounter reasons for outputting energy in a hundred little ways every day, in addition to the rolling list of serious endeavors with which we challenge ourselves. We work and play, tend to our homes, families, and friends. We also forcibly attempt to change the fabric of this reality.

The thing is that we tend to get used to this output, and forget the toll it takes on us. For instance:
How many stop lights did you pass through today? Did you try to push each of them? (Or create a flow through them, or flick the switch controlling them, etc.)
Did you push your phone to connect to the web a little faster while you were at a stoplight trying to post?
Did you will your classmates to do their part of the project they are putting off?
Did you push a little juju at the machine reading your debit card so it would read the fast deteriorating magnetic strip on a card you just don't have time to get replaced?
A million little things still add up to a lot of resources dumped into your day.

That doesn't even include the more distinct things we do:
How many times did you purposely ground yourself, or clear your energy fields of the debris of the world around you?
Did you work on that weave for bringing fortune to your business?
Did you spend some time with your favorite egregore?
Did you throw a little magic at something someone posted for help with?
Did you account for the fetch you sent to a sick friend? Because that part of you still draws from its source and the source is you.
Did you remember to keep something in reserve in case some little nasty decides you look like a buffet? What if it's not such a "little" nasty?

How much of your resources do you keep at hand, and how much do you keep in reserve? Are you aware that your output may change drastically at a moment's notice?
You might have to give up the resources that keep you from catching every little illness this season so you don't get smeared by that semi on the highway tomorrow.
You might have to stop fighting the effects of arthritis right now in order to keep yourself from being broken by the pneumonia you developed.
You might have the perfect method of fighting a global issue dawn on you, and have to act on it - now.
Or you might find one of those moments where you evolve a bit....
Are you prepared to be a little hobbled in order to grow or survive? Will you remember not to push every light in your favor as you recover?

Most of this doesn't sound like it provides much of an option, especially trading necessary processes for emergency saves.
That is why Self Care is important. Making sure you are aware of your ever evolving abilities and limitations is the difference between brushing past the worst repercussions and falling head first into the quicksand (where things like "not being able to continue your work because you burned out" happens).

The things we take in (food, environmental energy, knowledge, guidance, direct input from others) are the building blocks for continuing to do the work we do. The input of these things is essential, but knowing that is the easy part. The purer the input, the greater the resulting output. Food is the simplest, there are a billion places to gain info on eating healthy.

However, there's not as much info about what you do when you are still hungry after the food, when you are starving for energy input, inspiration, or information. The serious reality of the situation is that the hunger for these things is just as real, and much harder to accommodate. The lack of these resources will still lead to discomfort, anxiety, frustration, fatigue, and sometimes illness.
Especially if you are going through certain processes, like the ones that developing shaman go through. http://www.northernshamanism.org/shamanic-techniques/shamanic-healing/dead-men-walking-shaman-sickness.html

Whether we sing, write, heal, paint, cast, draw art on people, build cities, or adopt new traditions: we work to destroy the structure of this paradigm and prepare the world for change.
For those who hear the Call (the all encompassing desire, push, need to follow the path of action to change the world), the work requires our continuing time and attention. The deeper into the work we go the more time, attention, and energy it demands. Sometimes this extent of this demand is such that if you are not paying enough due attention to these tasks, your body will actually try to shut down while you are trying to attend to other things.Want to play that game? Sorry, you're too tired.
Having a pointless conversation with someone mundane? Your irritation level is going to irrationally skyrocket now.
Have you been too busy to do that research? I guess you just don't want to be able to pay attention to anything until you do.

By the time you learn to balance paying enough continuing attention to the work, you have probably started to notice extremes of unspent energy and energy drops. Here you end up running high or low on energy if you don't find ways to mediate it. Either excess is disruptive to say the least.
Self Care is acting on the mindful recognition of this circumstance. It is acting on your own behalf to avoid the impact of these issues on your daily life. Discovering the best methods of input for you, and the appropriate sources to tap is part of this process. Another part is the mediation: taking care not to overextend, having a plan for when you do. Rest, proper food, time in your favorite places is all important (they are your favorite for a reason, as they are usually your best environmental energy resources). These are all the simple steps to keeping things balanced. Finding the people who inspire you, who can relate to this part of your life, is essential. You may recognize that this is a relief, that you gain ground with these people as resources. You may not realize that you need the energy input that you provide one another. The act of interacting with one another is a mutual energy exchange, and it becomes more and more important the further you delve. For some people, conversation is enough. For others touch is key, and to varying levels.

Remember too that different people will provide different levels and types of energy. Also be aware that some people are adept at maintaining balance with these transfers, and some don't even recognize the exchange is happening. If you are the more aware individual, you will need to wage some sort of control over this process, to maintain a reciprocating flow, otherwise one of you will inevitably take or give away too much. This can be just as bad, or worse, than not attending to the hunger in the first place.


Now for the excesses: the energy buildups that leave you vibrating at a dangerous level, where grounding doesn't work. Sometimes this is from too much input of a given energy type, sometimes it's because another area is so depleted that you are way overbalanced. You might feel like you could accomplish the all of the things, but really you need to focus it somewhere. Either use it for some distinct work, or remove it from an overloading system. Think of a circuit that gets overloaded...it doesn't go well. Things fry, get burnt out, and don't ever work the same again. You don't want to be that circuit.

For excess there are a variety of options:
Give back to someone in need, a friend who burns at both ends often.
Give to something in nature (a friend of mine used to give back to small trees planted in urban areas, surrounded by cement and development).
Create something. Whatever your art is, Do It.

Feed the network. Let someone else draw it from there, or let Ellis determine where it should go.

Or squirrel that shit away. Keep it, store it, horde it till you need it. It's ok to have it, just don't try to store it all inside you. Put it in rocks, tie it up in knots on a cord, stash it in a well in your favorite part of the house. Whatever works for you.